Business
The economic outlook is most promising. As our special chart illustrates, from a sloppy low in 1930, stocks have enjoyed a steady rise to well past the fibula in 1945, and will reach a real peak late this year, just prior to Thanksgiving.
Music
After through research into the reasons for a recent dip in the sales of record-players, we've found a great many married playboys become conscience-stricken when their infidelities are played to the tune of high fidelity; they prefer to do their leman-squeezing sans this eternal etudic reprimand. We predict a boom in both music sales and philandering when this hypocritical misnomer, hi-fi, is renamed a stimulating "high frequency."
Automotive
The trend in sports cars is to higher speeds and lower silhouettes. Ticklish riders are advised to avoid fast travel over grassy byways.
Labor
Automation will make further inroads into business and industry. However, certain highly specialized fields will remain relatively free from encroachment by I.B.M.
Fashion
She: Paris, having milked the utmost from decolletage, will take an experimental plunge into "derrierrage." Thus the double cleavage gown certain to be a hit at coming out parties and other society functions this season.
He: Male attire will continue in the conservative vein. No padding, except in the wallet pocket for that expensive look. Lower waistlines will lend the heavy money-belt effect so irresistible to genus female. Ties? Thin. In fact, a short nose bleed will do the trick.
Sports
The 1956 Olympic Games will again see the American playboy walking (or crawling) off with top honors in the indoor sports division. We predict a bettering of the shot-put record of '52, when our own D. T. Liverstrain put 22 straight bourbon shots, 15 double Scotch and 37 beer chasers in thirty-four minutes flat, rest his dear, departed soul. The U.S. is expected to pile up points in the breast-stroke and in broad-jumping, winning both the marathon and re-lays, with a special Playboy award going to the winner of the sprints. The only serious threat to American supremacy comes from Persia's Pasha of Pandor, who has been in strenuous training with his harem all winter.
